


Consequences of Introducing Your Robot to the Internet

by melanshi



Category: Five Nights at Freddy's
Genre: Gen, It's 3AM, Memes, Originally Posted on Tumblr, They're best friends, and they were ROOMMATES, fake ending, i take back that friends tag, oh my god they were roommates, they're friends - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-06-24 07:25:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15625701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melanshi/pseuds/melanshi
Summary: In which Ennard decides to become a memelord and Michael’s just along for the ride.





	Consequences of Introducing Your Robot to the Internet

**Author's Note:**

> what up it's 3am and i lowkey wanna die but this did well on tumblr so i guess i'm also posting it here lmao enjoy

“Road work ahead? Uh, yeah. I sure hope it does.”

Michael forced himself to resist the urge to slam on the breaks right there in the middle of the crowded freeway. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the orange sign whip by and the robot in his back seat turn to look at him.

“Where’d you learn that?” he asked hesitantly.  _Keep your eyes on the road, Michael._

Ennard shrugged. “It was on the internet. I believe you called it ‘Youtube’. Quite a good website! It was part of something called ‘vines that keep my virginity’.” Michael nearly started crying. “What’s a vine, Mikey?”

Michael slowed the car to a stop. The road work seemed to be causing major traffic but at least it gave him time to talk. “It was a social media platform that consisted of people making short videos. A lot of them became memes.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Ennard tilt their head. “What’s a meme?”

Michael tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, driving a few feet along with the rest of the traffic. “It’s like… an internet joke. It’s an internet joke.” He adjusted the rear view mirror, catching Ennard’s curious face in it. “I’m surprised you don’t know about memes, considering how much you love the internet.”

Ennard’s face practically lit up. “It’s an absolute gift.” They shook their head. “I have one more question though.”

“Shoot.” He paused and with an afterthought added, “Not literally.”

“What’s a virginity?”

In the mirror, Ennard saw Michael’s face freeze up, eyes wide and mouth open. He shook his head and smiled awkwardly at them. “When we find Father, ask him.”

* * *

Halfway through the latest episode of  _the Immortal and the Restless_ , a pair of wired hands blocked out Michael’s vision.

“Guess whooo!”

He stifled a laugh, going for a snort instead. “Father?”

“No, silly!” Ennard uncovered his eyes and leaned over the couch, his smile seeming to grow bigger. “It’s me, Ennard!”

Michael muted the TV, twisting around on the couch to face the robot. “And to what do I owe your presence today?”

Without missing a beat, Ennard proudly held up a piece of paper. The paper had a ton of scribbles on it, with pictures of Circus Baby’s Entertainment and Rental sloppily taped on. The central focus of the picture featured a gray figure, obviously representing Ennard, shaking hands with a man in a purple shirt. Above the picture, in Ennard’s shaky handwriting, read “Friendship ended with CBER. Now Michael is my best friend!”

“Do you like it?” Ennard asked, barely containing their excitement. “It’s a meme!”

Michael gave them a fond smile. “I love it! In fact… can i borrow it real quick?”

Ennard looked at him quizzically, yet they held the meme out. Michael leapt over the back of the couch, carefully taking it from their hands. He gave them a quick and awkward pat on the shoulder before vanishing into the kitchen. Ennard followed a second later.

As they entered the kitchen, they found Michael digging through one of the drawers, frantically pulling papers and oven mitts out in a desperate attempt to find something. As Ennard stepped closer, Michael pulled a tiny circular object out. He seemed relatively pleased with his find and swept the drawing and the object towards the fridge. They followed, curious. Michael held the drawing up to the fridge, gently pushing a shopping list and a note reading “CALL JEREMY” to the side. He pressed the object against it and stepped back, the object, a magnet, holding the paper up.

Ennard stared at the fridge in surprise and glee. He felt Michael’s hand come to rest on his shoulder, leaning against him.

“It’ll be a bit odd to explain when the neighbors come over, but when have I ever been the normal one in this neighborhood?” At the robot’s lack of a response, he frowned. “Enny? Do you like it?”

“I–I love it!” His smile seemed to grow bigger again. “Do you think this makes me, as the people on the internet call it, a meme lord?”

Michael laughed. “Definitely.”

* * *

“Enny?”

Ennard refused to take his gaze off the top of the TV, even at the sound of Michael’s sleepy voice. “Yeah?”

“Oh, thank god,” Michael whispered. Ennard heard him feel his way down the stairs. “I thought we were getting robbed or something. Why are you being so loud? It’s 3 in the morning.”

“Exotic butters.”

The sound of footsteps stopped behind them. They could practically sense his frown. “What?”

“Exotic butters,” Ennard repeated. “They’re… a meme.”

“That doesn’t explain much.”

They peeled their eyes away from the half-filled bucket resting on top of the television and turned to face Michael. “They’re everywhere online, Mikey. They’re a meme. There’s remixes of Handunit saying ‘exotic butters’. It’s a meme, Mikey.”

Michael observed their face for a while before sighing. “I wasn’t the only person who worked at Circus Baby’s. I probably wasn’t the only one to get the exotic butters basket.”

Ennard lunged forward, grabbing onto his forearms. “But why?”

“Calm down,” he said, wiggling out of the robot’s grip. “It’s probably just a coincidence.”

He doubted his own words.


End file.
